Chili cheese dip and chips. Mmmmmm, cheesy.
"Karen" is happily married to "Brad" and has two children. Recently, Karen was explicitly hit on/propositioned by her officemate "Louise." Karen can't get it out of her head. Karen experimented in college and now is questioning her sexuality.
Karen asks, "Should I tell Brad about this and discuss allowing me to experiment and figure out this confusion in my head?"
So, Bloggers, put yourself in both Brad and Karen's shoes. How do you think Brad would really react (without knowing anything about him)? What would your advice to Karen be? I actually had an immediate response to all of this, didn't really have to think much about it. It's pretty black and white to me.
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17 comments:
Brad will automatically get a hard-on and think "woohoo, I can have sex with two women"!
:-)
I'll be back with a more serious answer later.
Chris's response was "Woohoo! Go ahead, but I want pictures...just to make sure she's not REALLY cheating on me with a man."
*rolls eyes*
Despite popular opinion, Brad would not be happy. Karen should ignore Louise and forget that she was propositioned.
I had more of a reaction that I don't think I can post here though.
Ok, I'm torn on this one.
On one hand, she's happily married with two children. Is she willing to take the risk of losing all that for an experiment?
On the other hand, if she's really confused, it could affect her for a long time.
Personally, I would not mention a thing to Brad and stay in my happy marriage.
I suppose she could wait a few months to see if the confusion dies down.
Tough one.
Nookie <----- always sitting on the fence :-)
*sits with Nookie*
I also may be sitting with MTW.
Well, I have to wonder how "happily" married she really is if she is thinking of cheating on Brad. Even if it is with a woman. If it is nothing but an experiment, I would say that she shouldn't upset the happiness of her marriage. Unless she thinks that Louise and Brad would both be up to some fun. If it is just a fun experimental type of thing and all three are into it, I would say play away.
BUT...if she is thinking that this is more than just an experiment and that perhaps she may in fact be gay, she may want to do some self analysis before making a decision.
I agree, maybe it's her marriage in general and not Louise.
I'm still (and always will be) of the opinion that cheating is cheating, and if I were Brad I'd be pissed. Of course, Karen would be wondering if she were straight....
I agree with Carey.
As well you should. *giggle*
I knew that was a mistake. *eye roll*
Cheating is cheating.
And I don't buy the confusion. She had her chance in college. She should STFU and forget about it.
(Unless it is the afformentioned semi-open marriage but that's very different)
I agree that cheating is cheating. But I do stand by the confusion part. Being in the gay community, I have seen plenty of people come out later in life and it was due to either confusion or fear. This chick could have been fearful all of those years and is just now realizing that she doesn't have to live her life as a straight woman.
So I'm not saying it's okay for her to cheat. But it is okay for her to explore herself deeper and figure out if she is gay or straight and act accordingly.
I agree with Carey, too. :)
I agree with Bravie. She needs to do some serious self analysis before acting on these possible feelings or non feelings.
Carey is right. She is allowed to think. But not too much.
It just seems to me that if someone has experimented in college, they've had their chance to check out the buffet. Then she decides she wants to get married to a man.
Maybe she's bi, maybe, she's even on the gay side of bi, but she chose a man and made a lifelong commitment to him.
At this point, I don't feel that the commitment is to the man, as it is to a person.
So 20 years later, a girl gets your moter running in a way your husband isn't. I don't find that any more meaningful than being attracted to the hottie pool boy.
(It is very different if someone has been closeted and miserable for years.)
Ahhhh, and Bob just hit it on the head. The point I was making. About being miserably closeted. I know it can be dreadfully painful. One of my best friends had to make this decision. She was married for 20 years and had two children under the age of 18 when she finally was honest with herself in realizing that she was gay. She left her husband. She was alone for awhile so that she could be sure of what she was doing. she has been with women ever since and has never been happier. She and her ex hubby remain friends although he admits to being terribly hurt.
I agree with MTW and Bob.
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